Happiness is a deceiving concept. It’s a rare thing indeed and almost unattainable in a long-term basis. We are told that we should strive to be always happy. Get a good job, study well, marry, have kids. All of these things will make you less miserable. Not true. We will always find a way to be miserable. It’s our default mode. When we have a good job we want a promotion. When we marry we eventually dislike our partners, or at the very least, find cause for discord. When we have kids we are unhappy with their behavior. And even if you are actually happy with these things, problems are always there: illness, misfortune, debt, loss, etc. Life never stops beating you up, and an eternal happy mode doesn’t exist on this world.

When you force yourself to be happy against the tide of reality, you become unwilling to be open to pain and hurt. This makes you naive and weak. A person that covers themselves from pain can’t possibly function to their full capacity, let alone become aware of how to treat others without hurting them

How can you improve yourself and understand how everything works by being happy? Not possible. Improvement comes from mistakes, to put it mildly, and not by having everything go your way all the time.

People like Jordan Jordan Peterson who dedicated their lives to meaning, advice that you shouldn’t strive to be happy, but instead strive to be meaningful. Find meaning in life’s ups and downs. Enjoy the good moments but make sure you absorb and learn from the bad ones just as much.